"Death With Dignity"?
The phrase "death with dignity" reveals a misunderstanding of what dignity is in the first place. The presumption is that there's a way to die without dignity.
Well, what is dignity anyway?
We get the word dignity from the Latin dignitas meaning "worth." All human beings have dignity--inherent value and worth. The way we die has nothing to do with our worth. We have dignity because we are human. Period.
How did we get our dignity as humans?
"Let us make man in our image, after our likeness..." (Genesis 1:26)
We have dignity because God gave it to us. He made us in His image and likeness. What can be more dignified than being made in the image and likeness of our Creator? When we understand what dignity really is, we understand that it is impossible to die without it.
So, what do people mean when they say that they are seeking "death with dignity"? They seem to mean that it is undignified, or beneath the worth of a human, to have to suffer. We hear this language all the time--especially when the person envisions themselves "becoming a burden" to loved ones or going through the humiliation of losing their physical or mental capacities.
It seems ridiculous to hear that line of thinking and gaze upon a crucifix.
Or look at images from The Passion of the Christ
He was humiliated.
Would we even dream of saying that He died without dignity?
He is God, and He went through humiliation and suffering before His death for us. Nonetheless, we seem to think that we are above certain ways of dying.
While we don't believe that suffering is good, and we can make appropriate medical interventions to avoid it unnecessarily, we may still suffer as we die. Palliative care is a wonderful blessing and gift for the dying, but we are not guaranteed that death will be as neat, tidy, convenient, efficient, or easy as we try to make the rest of our lives. So, if our death comes with suffering, we might as well put it to work.
Just like the woman in the story, I am a 29-year-old woman full of hope and plans for the future. I have no idea what God has in store for me. I pray that His plan includes raising our children into adulthood and living a long, healthy life, but it may not.
I've never received a stage 4 brain cancer diagnosis, but as Fr. John Riccardo says, "we're all terminal," from the moment we're born. I don't get to choose when or how I'll die, but I pray that God will give me the strength to do it well. My life is pure gift, only He gives me dignity, and only He will get to decide when my life will end.
The culture of death wants us to embrace suicide as "death with dignity." To convince us that "death with dignity" is a good choice, the proponents have to do language gymnastics. Brittany Maynard describes "death with dignity" like this:
"It is an end-of-life option for mentally competent, terminally ill patients with a prognosis of six months or less to live. It would enable me to use the medical practice of aid in dying: I could request and receive a prescription from a physician for medication that I could self-ingest to end my dying process if it becomes unbearable.""Aid in dying"? "End my dying process"? Suicide is the taking of one's own life. How can taking a prescription to end one's life be considered anything but suicide? Look no further than the comment boxes related to this story, and the people choosing "death with dignity" are called heroic, selfless, and brave.
I wrote a few months ago that I want people to do this when I'm dying: get a priest, make sure I receive the sacraments, and keep bringing me lists of intentions of people to pray for until I die. By God's grace, I'll be able to die a holy death. If I'm honest with myself, I admit that I'm terribly weak, so I'm trying to get spiritually fit for that moment now. I'm keeping lists of intentions and *trying* to remember to unite all of my sufferings (big and itty bitty) to the cross. That's tough stuff. That's the stuff saints are made of. Yet, that's what we're all called to.
As we approach November 1 (All Saints Day), the day that Brittany Maynard has chosen to commit suicide, let's all pray that those suffering find strength in the risen Lord and remember their dignity. May they imitate the lives of the heroic men and women in heaven who also suffered, remembered their dignity, took up their crosses, and followed Him.
"If any man would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." (Luke 9:23)
If you or a loved one is struggling with how to navigate end-of-life issues, consult the National Catholic Bioethics Center. They provide a free consultation service with qualified ethicists on-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week -- (215) 877-2660. They also publish an informative Catholic Guide to End-of-Life Decisions.