Wednesday, August 6, 2014

PMS-ing and "Safe Friends"

THANK YOU!  In my last post, I asked again for your prayers and your prayer intentions.  THANK YOU for your prayers and for asking for mine.  I'm feeling more patient with the kids, and the little changes I wrote about last time are making a big difference.  God's teaching this little complainer how to stop wasting whatever big or little suffering comes my way through offering it up.  I am so grateful for those of you who have asked me to pray for specific intentions.  It is so helpful to have a tangible list of prayer requests a few feet away when I'm tempted to throw in the towel on the day or have a pity party.  It helps to put my suffering to work and weave prayer throughout the day.  I'm sure some of you are laughing at this post, thinking about my not-so-big suffering and my "first-world problems."  That's okay because I know it is pretty ridiculous.  Yet, God's meeting me where I am, and I'm making itty bitty little baby steps toward trying to be more saintly with your help.  In theory, it'll be my training to be ready whenever the big stuff comes.  So, thank you for sharing your prayer intentions.  

Onto the point of this post:  Can we just admit that it's tough to feel like a good mom to young children when you're PMS-ing?  I've been keeping track of when my moods are wacka-wacka-wacka in relation to where I am in my cycle.  I learned that PMS is the real deal during our marriage prep Creighton Model classes, but I never sought help.  Perhaps a lil progesterone therapy will be in my future for PMS!  

Knowing that I'd be PMS-ing this week, I knew I'd need all of the extra help I could get in the prayer department.  Additionally, I thought it'd be smart to pick up the phone and set up a few playdates with "safe friends." 

What's a "safe friend," you ask?  Well, a safe friend is a friend you can call up at anytime to say, "I think I'm going crazy over here.  We need a playdate so that I don't do something I'm going to regret."  It seems to be a Law of Motherhood that when you and your children shouldn't be seen in public that you need to get out the most.  The times when I want to leave the house the least are the times when I need a safe friend.  A safe friend will take the call, hear your plea to get together, and make it happen.  

Safe friends bring new energy to the day, diffuse the craziness, remind you to keep fighting the good fight, and cheerlead you on to bedtime.  You'll leave a safe friend playdate feeling like a good mom--even if your kid has an epic temper tantrum or you start PMS crying.  Safe friends get that motherhood isn't always perfect or pretty, and they're there with you through the teething, potty training, and hormone roller coasters.  They know that we love our job but that sometimes we need some reinforcements.  

Safe friends make you glad you asked for a playdate so that even when the good, the bad, and the ugly are on display, you're not fearing that she's thinking, "There's a whole bunch of crazy happening over here, and I am never coming back."  When it's a perfect storm day of craziness and you're just trying to make it to bedtime, it's oh so glorious to have an unfazed firsthand witness to your life sincerely tell you that you're doing a good job.  Inevitably, I can lift her up next week when she asks me to talk her down because of her 3-year-old's penchant for whining.  Safe friends return the favor that way.    

Do you have safe friends?  How do you help each other out?  What happens when a playdate can't happen?  How have you been a safe friend?  

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